Lia Huynh, LMFT, is pleased to announce the release of an informative blog article and video on the topic of how to talk after an argument. The couples therapy San Jose counselor offers several specific steps that help to restore communication between two people who have argued. When things have cooled down, the last thing some of the parties want to do is bring it up again. And yet talking after an argument is a good idea.
In a loving relationship, the principals can safely discuss issues that arise and grow stronger as a result. It is possible to find closure about some of the hurt caused during the argument. The article describes some of the steps which can be used to restore healthy communication between the parties. Before opening a dialogue with another person following a dispute, it is best to wait long enough to be in a calm and cooperative mood. This mindset will permit hearing some difficult things from the other person. If one person is calm and non-defensive, this will put the other person in the same place.
More information is available at Lia Huynh, Relationship Therapist, LMFT, | Milpitas & San Jose
The next steps in the process include asking the other person to describe their feelings. Asking permission to open the discussion starts off on the right level. It is essential to focus on listening well and showing empathy for statements of emotion. Listening does something chemically to the defensive brain that calms the other person. Giving reflections, or mirroring what the other person is saying helps to clarify the point of view. Don’t take responsibility for an action or statement falsely, to appease the partner, but do take personal responsibility when it is warranted. Problem solves and follow through.
Author Lia Huynh, LMFT, is a counselor and therapist serving the Milpitas, San Jose, and Fremont areas. She has over 17 years doing couple’s counseling, individual counseling, Christian counseling, and counseling for Asian Americans.